I went out for lunch with my Luhya buddy *Dennis to his favourite joint in Westlands ‘Mabanda’ and he convinced me to try ‘their tastiest dish murenda’.
Everybody in the 6*6 hotel was shouting ‘Murenda! Murenda! Murenda! And I was inclined to shout also in case the ‘delicacy’ run out before my share. I was excited when my dish made its way towards me and I couldn’t wait to enjoy!
I scooped some piece of Ugali and dished it into the bowl with the best smile I could afford and boy….. That was the most disgusting food I have ever put in my mouth! I have had to go for counselling sessions that cost me a lot of money.
For those who don’t know Murenda, its some leaves that look like they grow somewhere close to where Museveni’s cows graze. There is so much sticky foul liquid pouring out of that thing and the smell is horrifying and I think if the thing’ is not cooked well it could carry a significant risk of death.
I also have to admit also that none of the foods I have eaten before prepared me for the Murenda nightmare and if forced to choose between crabs and Murenda, I would rather eat crabs for the rest of my life.
That’s not all, you can’t eat that thing without it sticking on your fingers…..now…. imagine this…. you walk into a hotel and everybody is licking their fingers, you sit there and think how awesome the food must be only to find out the licking is as a result of the food sticking on their fingers like some gum form the Eucalyptus tree.. Yuck!!!
I honestly think that anybody who eats Murenda should be avoided at all costs because the thing they stuff into their mouth could bloat you to death and you do not want to be near someone who eats foul-smelling sticky leaves and licks their fingers over lunch hour before getting back to the office. Personally, am not putting that thing in my mouth EVER again even with a gun on my head….PI stick to my Mukimo.
That’s all Ladies and Gentlemen. Thank you.
