Chris Hart: Thinking of starting a new relationship? Maybe hoping that this time you’ll find “the one”? Well, there are plenty of good guys out there to choose from.
But there’s also a load of rogues. They look good from a distance, but they also have a dark side.
So to avoid getting hurt, you need to be sure you’re not dating one of them.
That means watching every new guy’s behaviour like a hawk. And if you see even the slightest hint of trouble, run!
The first things to look for are dishonesty and any sort of flaky behaviour. Lies about where he is, who he’s with, who his friends are, where he lives, where he works and so on. Expect 100 per cent honesty right from the start, and if you don’t get it, run!
THE CHASE
Dump him if he’s never on time, cancels dates at the last minute, gets strange phone calls or messages, mistreats you, or is in any way weird with the people around you.
Maybe he’s charming to you, but rude to the waiters? Behaviour like that’s an early sign of personality issues, anger and abuse.
Then there’s the guy who’s just out to use you. He only wants you for your body, doesn’t actually like women, and avoids emotional intimacy.
He’ll promise the world to get you naked but will always leave you in the end. You’re with someone who’s pressuring you into sex? Gets aggressive or manipulative when you say no? Run!
Some guys just want a trophy to show their friends. They love parading you around, but won’t try to get to know you at all. All they want is for people to think they have a girlfriend, but you’ll never be treated like one.
Some guys love chasing a girl all the way to the altar if need be. But that’s as far as it goes. Once he’s got you, he’ll start looking for his next conquest.
Beware of a guy who’s controlling. Who quickly starts telling you how to dress, where you can go and how you should spend your money.
He may even try to stop you working, or being with your friends and family.
To begin with, it feels wonderful. He’s so deeply in love with you and “protective…” But slowly, day by day, you’re losing your soul. Run while you still can!
MOTHER SUBSTITUTE
Especially avoid a guy who’s financially unstable, probably unemployed and definitely lacking in ambition, who only wants a woman to take care of him!
Instead of looking for a partner to share a life full of achievement, he’s looking for a mother substitute.
Who’ll finance, feed and clean for him. Your new guy’s career doesn’t seem up to much? Somehow you always seem to end up paying for dinner? And you’ve started lending him money?
Make sure you can spot these characters. And if one of them does come into your life, send him on his way again as fast as you can!
