If you’re in a WhatsApp group where people are contributing funds for a couple to organize a wedding, financial advisor Good Joseph says it’s time you hit the exit button.

In a TikTok video that sparked a flurry of reactions, Joseph argued that weddings shouldn’t financially burden people who are already struggling to make ends meet.

“You can have a wedding—but not when your finances are in shambles. If you’re financially stable, go ahead and throw the most glamorous celebration. But if you can’t foot your bills without begging, your guests may feel pressured rather than joyful,” he said.

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Joseph questioned the logic behind creating fundraising groups for weddings, pointing out that such efforts often lead to debt. “The most important thing is the marriage itself, not the one-day party,” he added.

@goodjoseph220

kama uko kwa group ya wedding toka#Goodjoseph

♬ original sound – Good Joseph

Mixed reactions from Kenyans

While some Kenyans agreed with Joseph’s sentiment, others accused him of attacking the spirit of harambee, a long-standing tradition of mutual aid in Kenya.

Supporters applauded his call for financial responsibility, arguing that times have changed and people need to prioritize investments over lavish events.

Here’s how social media users weighed in:

• mista.he: “Sema tu wewe ni stingy.” (Just admit you’re stingy.)
• jnr gelly: “Mimi group naeza changa ni matanga pekee yake.” (The only group I can contribute to is for funerals.)
• Essy W Kariuki: “There’s no harm in planning a wedding for friends and contributing… Sitoki kwa hiyo group (I’m not leaving that group)… life’s too short to complicate simple things.”
• Developer Felix: “Budget 1M, Couple – 35K. Then the group admin says: ‘Let’s be serious, we have a target!’”
• Reen Murugi: “My late grandfather told me to get rich in friends, not money. When he fell ill, friends cleared a KSh 400K bill in two days.”
• brianmumo8: “Na ukipatwa na any event nani atakuchangia kama hauchangi wengine bana?” (When you’re in trouble, who’ll fundraise for you if you don’t contribute for others?)
• Waziri Wa Kawi: “Sisi men have no problem. Shida inakuja kwa women, they insist on weddings and can’t be convinced otherwise. Economy ni wewe.” (We men are fine. The problem is with women—when they want a wedding, they won’t change their minds. You are the economy.)

Other views on collective responsibility

James Mwangi wrote: “It doesn’t matter whether the problem looks genuine or not. If your friend is in need, help. Today it’s dowry, tomorrow it’s a funeral.”

Ck Mutua added: “After the wedding, attend funerals and take last expense covers… KSh 1,320 a year for a 100K cover—hit me up!”

Mich Kambo emphasized: “We should invest in humanity. We need each other. Mimi nitachanga tu.” (I’ll still contribute.)

hellenic031: “If I had a second chance, I wouldn’t do a wedding. Total waste of money. Ningekua nimenunua plot nikajenga (I should’ve bought land and built). I really hate it.”

Debbie Symphony: “Am I the only one who doesn’t mind kuchanga harusi (contributing to weddings)? Just add me—I’ll chip in 😂 At least I’ll eat!”

KK: “Life is more than ROI. Sometimes you invest in people because relationships matter more than money.”

Celestine: “I never leave; I stick around to see how they hit their target. After the wedding, I bounce.”

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On broader financial responsibilities

In a separate conversation, Britam Holdings CEO Tom Gitogo also weighed in on financial pressures—this time focusing on black tax, or the expectation to support extended family members.

Gitogo urged people to be discerning with their finances and avoid reckless borrowing for non-essential expenses.

“Society taught us that every villager is your responsibility. But in truth, they are not. You have your own struggles. You’re also trying to make it in life,” he said.