Oscar gown worn by actress Lupita Nyong’o that was stolen two days ago was returned on Friday by the thief, who tipped off celebrity news site TMZ.com after finding out that the pearls on the dress were fake. TMZ said the thief took the Calvin Klein dress from Lupita Nyong’o hotel room on Wednesday after finding the door ajar.

The high-flying Lupita Nyong’o had worn the dress adorned with 6,000 pearls to Sunday’s Academy Awards in one of the most commented looks of the night.

The thief and others removed two pearls from the dress and took them to the Garment District in downtown Los Angeles where they were told they were not real, according to TMZ. The thief then took the dress back to the London West Hollywood hotel and told TMZ it was in a garment bag inside a trash bag in a bathroom.

TMZ then tipped off the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department in West Hollywood, which was investigating the theft. The website shows grainy footage of an unidentified person opening the bag and finding a white dress.

The Sheriff’s Department confirmed a white pearl dress had been recovered at the London hotel Friday and said it would release more details later.

Relationships don’t go bad overnight. There are subtle and destructive behaviour patterns which erode the bond between spouses or partners. These toxic attitudes can turn a fairytale relationship into an MMA Super Fight.

But not all is lost. When particular destructive patterns of behaviour are identified and addressed, a relationship on life support can become healthy again.

Know how to identify these 3 things that might be killing your relationship, so you can catch trouble before it starts.

1. Mind reading

The easiest way to set a relationship on a death spiral is to play armchair psychic. Mind reading takes a posture of assumption instead of listening, judgment instead of compassion.

When we try and read the thoughts, motives, and intentions of another person, their voice is taken away. It dehumanizes the partner and does not give them room for explanation. We all struggle with this one because it’s easier to play “mind reader” than listen to your partner.

If you say, “I know why you did this…” there’s a possibility mind reading has entered the relationship.

2. Control

The desire to control your partner, is rooted in fear and insecurity. A controlling attitude has more to do with us, and less with the partner.

When control enters a relationship, an underlying fear is buzzing behind the surface. It may be fear of not knowing the future. Fear of abandonment. Fear of being seen as a terrible spouse.

Until we get a handle on our own insecurities the partner will suffer.

If we constantly say “Don’t do that,” or “Stop doing this,” we might be a control freak.

3. Routine

All relationships get stale. When partners get comfortable with one another they stop doing the little things. Boredom and disinterest set in.

But this is normal. It just means we need to mix it up. Maybe we need a new routine. A date night every Friday night. A vacation to an exotic locale. Taking up a hobby together. Or finding different ways to communicate with one another.

Routine doesn’t need to have the last say in a relationship. Identify it. Mix it up. Watch your relationship come back to life.

source:entrepreneur.co.za

Team projects are difficult to pull off. You’re facing unfamiliar obstacles and relying on new processes. Members of your team may not have a shared history, meaning they’re leaning how to work with each other. The short-term nature of many projects means it’s hard to rally everyone around an inspirational vision.

So how can you lead your next group project to success? Surprisingly, you should actually amp up the difficulty by delegating tough tasks.

It sounds counterintuitive, but according to a study published in the Journal of Leadership and Organizational Studies, giving a team member difficult assignments actually increases his or her overall commitment to the project.

“As an individual’s expectations of his or her performance capability are affected by the project’s difficulty, the individual will adjust his or her behavior (in terms of effort and direction) to ensure the project’s success,” the researchers explain.

In other words, being challenged will make your co-workers care more about the project’s outcome and work harder—making it much more likely that you and your team will achieve the end-goal.

However, what’s challenging to one person is a breeze for another. Before your next project begins, make a list of your team members and include what you know of their strengths and weaknesses. Then, once you’ve broken down the project into sub-tasks, you can delegate based on individual potential.

Throughout the project, make sure to ask team members if they feel comfortable with the work and whether it’s well-suited to their capabilities. If it doesn’t seem like someone is being challenged, change his or her role to make it more important or complex.

It turns out, everyone does love a challenge. Apply this concept at work, and watch your projects succeed.

source:themuse

You might consider what Steve Pogorzelski has found. He’s spent the past 25 years vetting hundreds of candidates for leadership jobs, notably as group president of Monster.com Worldwide, where he helped the career site more than triple its revenues to $1.4 billion. Last August, Pogorzelski stepped in as CEO at sales and marketing data analytics firm Avention (formerly OneSource), where he has since replaced six out of eight of the company’s C-suite executives.

How candidates use two pronouns can reveal (almost) everything you need to know.

“What has been your biggest professional success so far, and why?”

It may sound like the same question every other interviewer asks, but Pogorzelski is listening for something different. After all, most people’s biggest successes are already obvious from their resumes, cover letters, and social media profiles. “What I want to hear is the word ‘we,’” he says. “The way someone describes how they achieved their biggest goals speaks volumes about them as potential leaders.”

“What has been your biggest failure, and why?”

Again, this query is such a staple of job interviews that candidates are likely to have a canned answer ready to go. What they may not realize is that Pogorzelski is listening for where they put the blame. “The word I want to hear when people answer this is ‘I,’” he says. “If someone tells me they failed at something because someone else messed up, or the economy was bad, or for any other reason that was not their fault, that’s a big red flag.”

“What could the company be doing better than we do now, or how could I do my job better?”

Very few people expect this question, so an interviewer can get a glimpse of how a candidate thinks on his or her feet. And it’s a good way to find out how much research and thought someone has put in before the interview. Any response that shows a thorough knowledge of the company, the industry, and the competition is okay, and may even reveal some useful insights.

source:fortune

If you’re a workaholic who has a difficult time disengaging from your duties, then maybe it’s time to realign your work and personal time habits. Take a look at these three ways to keep your mind off work during your downtime.

Don’t take work home with you

Simply put, make it extremely difficult or even impossible for you to complete work tasks from home. Leave your work files at the office, remove your professional email account from your personal phone, and get some physical separation between you and your work materials. This can be extremely difficult to accomplish if you’re able to work remotely from home. In this case, try to keep work-related data relegated to certain areas of your house, such as your home office. Don’t let professional emails, documents and other materials leak into areas dedicated to relaxation.

Say “no” to extra tasks

It can be too easy to over commit to work tasks near periods of downtime. If you feel like your calendar is filling up too fast, then don’t be afraid to say “no.” You need to keep you time off clear so that you can adequately enjoy the holidays. This can be a particularly difficult exercise for workaholics who love to lend a hand. Saying “no” can feel extremely awkward, but it is an useful skill to practice at work. Protect your personal time by not signing up for additional duties during the holiday season.

Does your time off seem a little less intimidating now? You can reduce the likelihood of becoming overworked by planning ahead, leaving work at the office, preparing an informative email auto-responder, and by avoiding additional work responsibilities that can stress you out during vacations and holidays.

Source:fortune