Have you ever been in a situation where someone wants to borrow money, and you are not willing to lend them? It is undoubtfully one of the awkward moments because you don’t want to let them down, and also, you don’t want to involve yourself in debt claims.
In fact, some people say yes for the belief that saying no is uncaring, being selfish, or the fact that he or she fears letting people down. Some even fear being disliked, criticized, or risking a friendship.
While making people happy is a good thing, it sometimes ends up damaging you when you don’t learn how to say no. Sometimes no is the best answer and the one you should give. The question then is how to say it without damaging your relationship with that person.
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Listen to them
Don’t be so quick to say no before listening to their reasons for the quest. A quick no may make the feel offended. Listen to the person first so that you weigh out the nature of the problem and the person feels respected and cared for.
Ask for Time
If you feel pressured to say yes, offer to think about your decision later. After thinking about it, you will have acquired the courage to say no. You can also suggest something that will work for both of you. If the borrower is so much interested in the money, they will eventually ignore your suggestion and go borrowing somewhere else
Make it Simple
Many people agree to loan requests because they don’t feel that they can say no. You don’t have to say yes, so don’t let the pressure get to you. Keep your response direct and simple.
“I’m sorry, I am not in a position to lend you at this time,”
or
“No, I’m held up with other responsibilities and we can’t do that now,”
or even better,
“No, I’m not giving you any money.”
Sometimes you don’t need a reason.
Be firm
Be firm in your answer. Avoid responses such as maybe, let me check my balance, I don’t have money right now, but I’m expecting some in the evening, etc. Don’t sound as if you’d like to help.
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A no today might turn into a yes tomorrow or next week. If you hint that a loan might be possible “someday,” you’re really just setting up that person to repeat the same awkward conversation with you in the future. Just say no, and stick to that one simple and final answer.
Offer other aid
Rather than giving them money, you can assist in some other ways, such as giving them a bag of food, offering transportation, or other possibilities. Try to be creative. That way, they will feel cared for and loved.
If they ask for a loan next time, offer another form of assistance. If they are more interested in the money, this is a better way of preventing future conversations because they will be sure you will still offer another aid.
Don’t Feel Guilty
There is nothing to feel guilty about. You have the right to say no. Say no from time to time and develop a sense of self-control. Navigating life without this important skill is a fickle business. Keep it real and straight.